I can confidently say I graduated High School without google! If you were an 80s or 90s kid you know exactly what I mean! It’s so interesting to me how our childhood shapes the way we grow up. Psychologist say in order for a child to grow up properly they need respect, encouragement, attention, affection, and appreciation. That’s a lot! But what we can see here is that whatever we didn’t receive as a child, we now look for in our spouse (or in a future spouse, if you’re single). So truly most people marry trying to fulfill a need and for someone else to fix what was broken from their childhood. This can probably conclude why half of all marriages end in divorce. This breaks my heart. Mostly because in today’s society, the word divorce is so commonly thrown around to where people don’t understand the impact of it. Let me put it this way, what if I told you that half of airplanes that take off today are going to crash. How much would you start to research your flight, even your pilot, and all the things that go into a flight? If we would do that on an airplane, why wouldn’t we do that for who we are going to marry. Who you marry has everything to do with where you are going to go in life. I know God intends for us to have healthy, thriving, strong, and happy marriages but majority of the time we are looking to the wrong source for our validation and happiness. If we are looking to our spouse for our worth and validation most days they will fail. Not because they are imperfect but because there is no way they can fulfill all those needs. If you want to begin to have strong, healthy relationships then your spiritual life has to be a part of your plan for a healthy relationship. I love in Colossians 2:6 (TPT) where Paul is telling us to continue our faith journey. The great thing about this is that it is different for everyone. To some that may be starting counseling with you and your significant other or for some it may be joining your local church. Then it continues in verse 7 to let us know that your not going to be full of strength and encouragement until you first find it in God. Some of you are feeling so discouraged and want to give up, but it’s because you have your eyes on the wrong people to fill it. God is the only one who can and it depends on how rooted you are to your relationship with Him! Continuing in verses 9-10 we see that we are made complete and full in Him alone. Once we can comprehend that, then you will stop looking to your spouse to fulfill things that they can’t and realize that in Christ you have everything you need!
Let’s not be part of a statistic, instead let’s be part of a thriving, healthy, and happy marriage!